Three Lessons I Learned From My Three Month Honeymoon
My wife and I got married this year on June 30th, and ten days later we headed West for a three month road trip across the country. I had been wanting to do something like this for a while. When my wife and I finally decided to do it about a year prior, I began spending countless hours researching and planning the trip-- everything from hikes we'd do, campgrounds we'd stay, breweries we'd visit, cities we'd explore, and friends we would try to see along the way.
As you can imagine, all of this planning and focused thought on the trip caused great anticipation inside me! I had butterflies...just like the ones you get when you find your first high school crush. This trip would be the best three months of my life!! How could it not be when I was going to visit dozens of national parks and get to experience endless jaw-dropping views?! I had been out West a few times before, so my appetite had already been whet.
July 11 finally arrived...the day we would embark on our epic adventure. The night before had that Christmas Eve kind of feeling--I felt like a giddy teenager. It really is true what they say about anticipation being half the fun of a trip. I had waited so long and FINALLY, wild west here we come!
Fast-forward 93 days, 16000 miles, 31 states, 24 national parks, and about 2000 photos...the most epic trip of my life had come to an end. I admit, I was ready for it to be over and to settle into a home with my wife BUT I still grieved. The final few days of the trip and several days after we returned home had a heaviness to them. I felt sad. I felt energy-less. I felt like I couldn't believe it was actually over.
I thought I had a direction for where I was taking this blogpost, but it didn't really go there. So, I will conclude with three lessons I learned from going on my three month honeymoon...
As you can imagine, all of this planning and focused thought on the trip caused great anticipation inside me! I had butterflies...just like the ones you get when you find your first high school crush. This trip would be the best three months of my life!! How could it not be when I was going to visit dozens of national parks and get to experience endless jaw-dropping views?! I had been out West a few times before, so my appetite had already been whet.
July 11 finally arrived...the day we would embark on our epic adventure. The night before had that Christmas Eve kind of feeling--I felt like a giddy teenager. It really is true what they say about anticipation being half the fun of a trip. I had waited so long and FINALLY, wild west here we come!
Fast-forward 93 days, 16000 miles, 31 states, 24 national parks, and about 2000 photos...the most epic trip of my life had come to an end. I admit, I was ready for it to be over and to settle into a home with my wife BUT I still grieved. The final few days of the trip and several days after we returned home had a heaviness to them. I felt sad. I felt energy-less. I felt like I couldn't believe it was actually over.
I thought I had a direction for where I was taking this blogpost, but it didn't really go there. So, I will conclude with three lessons I learned from going on my three month honeymoon...
- Embrace the grief that accompanies change. Change is the one absolute in life, so don't be too surprised when it comes and don't suppress your emotions that arise with that change. Sit with them and process through them. Acknowledge them as real, knowing that they will eventrually pass.
- Go on your "Three Month Honeymoon." No, I'm not saying everyone should actually go on a three month long roadtrip. I'm not so naive to think this a feasible endeavor for everyone. But you know what that one thing is that you get excited about...that thing you've maybe been putting off or ignoring for a while now. Maybe it's taking that online course, going to visit an old friend, or something even simpler. Whatever it is, MAKE IT A PRIORITY. If you don't make it a priority, you'll never do it. People have often asked me, "How are you able to go on a three month honeymoon?!" The answer is simple: I was focused on making it happen. I knew that if I didn't do it, I would regret it someday. So ask yourself, "What's that one thing that I'll regret not doing?" Then, write it down and make a list of simple action steps that you can begin taking to make your priority a reality. It may take weeks, it make take years. That's okay because it will be worth it!
- People, first...Experiences, second...Possessions, third (or much lower). I was able to get the best of both worlds, going on the trip of a lifetime with my best friend-- my wife. Sometimes I would go out and do a long day hike by myself, and would often find myself thinking how badly I wished my wife was with me. Despite seeing some awesome wildlife and epic landscapes, I longed to be near her. I realized that she mattered more to me than any trip or experience...she fulfilled me in a way that nothing else ever could. I deeply value my alone time and believe that everyone should get certain doses of it. But at the end of the day, people matter most. And second to that, I would suggest making experiences a priority over possessions. Experiences impact you, they shape you and foster growth in your life. Possessions break, and that feeling of satisfaction they instantly offer quickly dissipates. I believe this simple recipe of people, first...experiences, second...possessions, third (or much lower) will provide you with a life of fulfillment instead of disappointment.
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